Tag Archives: humor

Getting to know someone from two thousand miles away.

Posted on July 31, 2012 by

“Sooo, what do y’all talk about anyway?” is by far the number one question I’m being asked lately about my long-distance fella. Followed closely by “Is he a Mormon?” / “Does he have any sister wives?” (he’s from Utah) and “Are … Continue reading →

Posted in Summer | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Is cautiously optimistic the same thing as recklessly pessimistic?

Posted on July 5, 2012 by

Too much? Hello, dear friends. I have quite an update to share! Remember how I signed up for eHarmony and joked about a couple of my ridiculous matches? Well…… they weren’t all ridiculous. My One Year Challenge ended in the middle … Continue reading →

Posted in Summer | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments

There are two types of people in the world: Parrot Heads and everyone else.

Posted on June 14, 2012 by

“Arrrrgh.” It has long been known to me that the people in the Parrot Head subculture are, for the most part, complete lunatics. I don’t mean this as an insensitive, sweeping generalization, but the simple act of stating that I don’t like … Continue reading →

Posted in Spring | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

7 minutes in heaven with WordPress

Posted on June 3, 2012 by

Wednesday, the powers that be at WordPress spun their magic bottle, the neck came to a palm-sweat-inducing halt in my specific direction, and we spent seven glorious minutes making out on the front page for all the world to see. I … Continue reading →

Posted in Spring | Tagged , , , , , , | 26 Comments

eHarmony and other embarrassing credit card purchases

Posted on May 29, 2012 by

I made it about a week into my new not-really-trying-to-meet-anyone-but-not-not-trying dating life before I signed up for eHarmony last night. I clearly have no resolve and no faith that life will work out the way it’s supposed to. You know, the way I say … Continue reading →

Posted in Spring | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 294 Comments

Day 340, or you have been slapped.

Posted on April 18, 2012 by

After writing my post about depression, I decided to go to bed early. Then I decided to make some cocoa instead, then I decided to watch a movie, then I was so tired from the decision-making that I collapsed on the … Continue reading →

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Day 324, or villainous moustache-twirling ex-boyfriends playing the victim.

Posted on April 2, 2012 by

I remember my grandmother said something about pretending to be a helpless woman to keep men interested when I was in my formative teen years. Even then I thought that was poppycock. Around the same time, I read the autobiography of … Continue reading →

Posted in Spring | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Day 312, or premature infatuation and unintentional karaoke.

Posted on March 21, 2012 by

Once upon a time I dated a German guy from the little-known, impossible-to-pronouce country town of Schwäbisch Gmünd. Go ahead, try it – you can’t say it, either, can you? I think only people born there can pronounce it. Actually, I … Continue reading →

Posted in Spring | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Day 310, or do you feel happy or sad?

Posted on March 19, 2012 by

Yesterday at work, I was standing near the front of my store chatting with one of my associates about our overuse of the word shenanigans and whether or not we wanted to send someone on a coffee run when we heard a … Continue reading →

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Day 308, or poor tipping confessions and thoughts on romantic foibles of yore.

Posted on March 17, 2012 by

I have a confession to make about my little field trip to the strip club last week with the Adonis and my friend. Adonis very generously provided us each with a stack of singles for insertion (hehe) into various G-strings. At … Continue reading →

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